Why Do They Change The Moment They Touch Down In America?

I’m a young girl working and also a student in level 300 trying to make life a better place for myself
I met this guy at the naming ceremony of my Uncle’s son at his Church. We exchanged contacts and started talking to each other almost everyday, he then proposed and asked me to be his girlfriend, I accepted because I had come to like him.

I have been dating him for 2 years now. When we started dating he had the opportunity to travel outside Ghana for a 2 years working contract, initially I didn’t like the idea because if felt he could get a better job here in Ghana but he had to travel to secure our future.
Before travelling he took me to meet his mum and he also came to meet my family and the necessary introductions were done.

Why Do They Change The Moment They Touch Down In America?
Why Do They Change The Moment They Touch Down In America?

He finally travelled leaving me here, I always stayed here alone thinking I had someone I was waiting for and turning down proposals from other guys.
He started using a lady’s picture on his WhatsApp profile and anytime I asked him about it he tells me it’s one of his cousins but since I don’t know all his cousin’s who am I to doubt him. I realised he was also using her picture as his laptop wallpaper when he called me on video call, I asked him about it, he denied and got angry with me saying I already know she’s his cousin.

I’m someone who is not soo much into social media, I was only using WhatsApp and Facebook but he was always telling me to go on Instagram so before my birthday last year I decided to create an Instagram account but he didn’t like the idea of me creating the IG account anymore. Since he saw I had joined IG, he decided to delete his account which I didn’t understand him because I thought he was the one always telling me to go there. After some months a new account came to like my pics on IG I checked and realised it was him but he denied he hadn’t created any new account like that and that he’s no more on IG.

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After some weeks I decided to check on that account and I realised the lady’s picture was on that account, I then decided to ask him again and this time around he couldn’t lie to me anymore and before that I had asked about the lady from one of his friends and his friend had already told me the lady was his ex girlfriend and that they were dating way back in Senior High School but he doesn’t know what was going on between them now.

Why Do They Change The Moment They Touch Down In America?
Why Do They Change The Moment They Touch Down In America?

He later came confessing and admitting the truth only for him to tell me that she’s his ex girlfriend from SHS and that she was also 3 months pregnant for him, at that moment I was so speechless and felt the blow on my face, tears started flowing down my cheeks, he apologised and begged me not to inform any of my family members and also his mum or anyone. He claims he met her over there and things started to rekindle between them but I got to find out they started talking to each other again even before I came into the picture so he invited the lady to came visit him over there.

She is actually living in the US and my boyfriend was working in Qatar so he invited her to be in Qatar with him.
I thought after all that, he was going to change the picture on all his social media accounts but he still kept her picture there so I decided to ask him about it and he could tell me he was doing that since the lady was pregnant for him and also I know how pregnancy can bring about mood swings so trying to do things to make her happy, that moment I asked him if he had ever thought about my feelings and happiness too, he told me he doesn’t wanna settle with her and that I’m the one he wants to settle with because she’s not a marriage material and also might end up controlling him because she’s well to do.

Why Do They Change The Moment They Touch Down In America?
Why Do They Change The Moment They Touch Down In America?

I decided to keep my distance from him, I was trying to ignore him but he kept getting closer.
One morning at work he called me only for him to accuse me for accepting to date him because of his money, I felt soo hurt for him to think about me in that way so I asked him if he was even working when we first started dating, was he even having a place he was staying or he was perching at his cousin place, even when he travelled I was lending my boss’ money to him and payment sometimes became difficult so I said if it were to be money then he was never an option, I only loved him genuinely.

Even earlier last year I bought some gifts for his mum and visited her to give them to her and he was the same person saying why do I worry myself because he knows I don’t earn much salary and also he hasn’t been given me money so why then do I worry myself I then told him I felt like doing that for his mum. I was also not putting any kind pressure on him for anything, I have been one independent lady doing everything myself, paying my school fees, cloths, feeding and he never had anything to do with it because he was always complaining about his salary being bad and that he’s not even able to save or eat good food, I understood him perfectly and didn’t wanna pressure him.

He told me he wasn’t hearing from the lady again and that she’s angry at him and doesn’t even want talk to him because she wasn’t ready to get pregnant so she kept on ignoring his calls and messages but I doubted all that.
In January this year, he called to tell me he will be coming back to Ghana because his contract was over. He got to Ghana last month and I have decided not to entertain him like I would have done if nothing had happened between us, he is rather now going around making it look like I’m the bad person here.

Why Do They Change The Moment They Touch Down In America?
Why Do They Change The Moment They Touch Down In America?

Just upon his arrival last month, he has bought himself a new car so I told myself someone who claimed the salary was bad and that he couldn’t even save or afford to eat good food, has been able to afford to buy a new car. I then realised I was taking for a fool all this while waiting for him and understanding his situation and was always praying things gets well with him.

The issue now is that I finally made time to meet him when he got to Ghana so we could talk, he’s now telling me the lady has finally given birth and that she’s coming to Ghana this month with the baby for them to get married but doesn’t want to get married to her because I’m the one he loves and wants to get married to but I made it known to him that I can no longer be with him and not interested in getting married to a liar like him. He then asked if I care about his happiness because he’s not going to be happy with the lady and doesn’t love her too.

Kobby told me it was a mistake but I feel in as much as it was a mistake, he wouldn’t make the lady feel special than me since he claims he loves me but I feel there’s something fishy in this issue.

I need your opinions and advises on this issue. I want to know if I’m not being too mean or I’m just saving myself from another heartbreak and disappointment.
I will be reading comments. Thanks

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