I will never advise any young lady to marry a pastor especially one that does this spiritual-daughter thing. My husband is a pastor and we have been married for ten years with three kids. We married when he was just twenty-five because his father wanted him to settle down before he is ordained as a man of God. His father is a pastor too.
Exactly two years into our marriage, he got one of his spiritual daughters pregnant. As a good wife, I understood when he confessed to me and showed some remorse. I suggested abortion so the lady could just go away but he refused, saying he can’t sin twice. He insisted we rent a small place somewhere a bit far away from the community for the girl to stay and have the baby. His decision broke me in a way but I eventually got used to idea. He sends her money, foodstuffs and sometimes goes to see her but I just didn’t care. We had welcomed our first baby not too long before the incident happened.
I thought this will teach my husband a lesson but it didn’t. He kept having daughters and kept engaging them in all his deeds. I was pissed, I reminded him of our little secret but still, this man won’t listen. Two years on, he got another lady pregnant and after everything, he again asked that we get her a place to stay and have the baby.
This time around, I couldn’t take it so I asked for a divorce but he pleaded with me and all that so I stayed. I once asked him if he wants multiple wives but he denied and said I am the only lady he wants as a partner. I was very disturbed yet, I kept it a secret from his family and the church. The thought of my husband having kids and baby mama’s outside our home kept eating me up but I eventually got over it after some years. Though he never changed his way of entertaining his daughters, after five years when nothing like that had happened, I was thinking he had learnt his lesson, foolish me!!
Just last week, I bought us a new wardrobe. I wanted to surprise him with it because he had always said he will buy a modern one but never does. As I was moving our clothes into the new wardrobe, I came across a small notebook and what I saw in it was very awful. In it was a list of thirteen names, all having his surname and the names of some of the ladies he had as daughters that I never got to hear of again. When he came back and I threatened to reveal to his parents and the church, that’s when he foolishly told me that he had wanted to tell me but he feels I may not be able to handle it. He wants me to handle the idea of him having thirteen kids with eleven women (two twins) outside our marriage and allowing all of them to deliver.
My husband is a poor pastor. Sometimes I wonder how because the money that comes to the church is a lot but he never gives any proper accounts. I kept wondering what he does with all those monies. He has a very flourishing business; people dash him as huge as 20,000 to 40,000 cedis sometimes. All these monies and he was still poor. I always knew something was wrong and of course, something was.
I don’t want to stay in the marriage anymore neither do I want to keep it hidden. Everyone thinks he is a good man and I am a happy wife. You see the type of nonsense I am going through? A foolish pastor who can’t control his sexual urge and is reproducing as if he has his own planet. I hate him. I want to expose him and then divorce him so no one will call me ‘bad’ for anything.