I need your wise counsel.
I’m a thirty three years old married man with two kids. I got married 5 years ago to the most beautiful woman on my list by then. I am a womaniser, I admit it. I didn’t want to be like that in marriage so I made sure I chose a woman whom I’d always be attracted to but unfortunately, I started cheating just six months into the marriage and it has continued till date. I’m honestly not happy cheating on my wife but I lack the self control.
My wife, despite not being very respectful and submissive to me, is also very dirty. I blame myself for choosing beauty over character when I was selecting a wife so I don’t really mind her nonsense but it’s as if that’s the reason I’m cheating on her.
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During the first six months of marriage, I never cheated on her. I ended every external affair and committed myself to the marriage but she changed during the second half of the year till date. I find it pretty difficult to be in the house with her because she won’t let me have peace of mind. She’ll ask for money every one minute(I give her Ghc500 weekly), she’s always buying food from outside and there are always dirty clothes in the house. She can go a whole month without washing. The house is so disgusting at the moment. There’s washing machine, there’s iron, there are foodstuffs and everything but, this lady won’t do anything at all. She’ll be lying in the couch watching movie before I leave home and when I return, she’ll be at the same place doing same thing. I bath and take the kids to school just so she can do chores but unfortunately, my house is always in a mess.
I don’t really blame her much like I said, I didn’t really go for character because I used to think sex matters most in marriage but right now, I’m not even sexually attracted to her, I rather enjoy doing it outside. She can be on her phone from 9pm till 3am before she sleeps. Watching all sort of nonsense on the Internet and then, ask me to bath and take the kids to school because she’s tired. She wasn’t that bad when we were dating and even during the first six months, I don’t know what has come over her. Though I used to do women, it was my intention to quit that behaviour after marriage but here I am, running after other women because my wife is full of sh*t. She can stay home all day without bathing. She even stinks sometimes. The house is a mess, I don’t even ask anyone to visit me no more. She resigned from her job because she said she wants to do business. I opened a boutique in front of the house for her, got her a sales girl but what did she do, she squandered all the business cash, fired the girl and closed down the shop till date. She wants another money to start over again.
I feared divorce the most but I married the wrong woman. Deep down, I wish I can change things. I wish to divorce her and start over again but, I’m scared of the effects of divorce on my kids. I wanted to give them the best life.
Sir, do you think divorcing her is a good decision, taking my kids into consideration please. I need your view before I take any step. Thanks.